Today I had the biggest day I have had since my accident. I had three hours on a return to work program at my 'day' job as a disability worker - where they have set me the task of sorting through the filing system, then a little bit of dog training, plus a few appointments! I think Buddy (my dog) was most upset, it's the longest he's been left too!
Starting back at my 'day' job has been interesting. I have only done 3 hours monday and wednesday, but sheesh - I felt like I had worked a full 14hour shift..! When the return to work guy was talking about slowly getting me back into it, I thought "pfft - I can easily do a whole day". But after three hours, I was tired, sore and mentally exhausted! (and may or may not of needed a nana nap!!) It's so easy to get frustrated at what you CAN'T do…you know "I used to be able to walk the dog, pack the car, have a dog training client, make a phone call, do a 10km run…" just before breakfast! So to be tired after only three hours of office work…well … that's an insult!
So I have been focussing this week on identifying, acknowledging and being proud of what I've accomplished so far! I sat down with my pen and paper and started writing. What can I do today, that yesterday, last week, last month I couldn't do? The list kept growing and it made me realise that to compare myself to when I was at peak health, fitness and mental clarity (as I was before my accident) to when you are recovery from a trauma, have ongoing injury and fatigue easily - is preposterous!
…Until Tomorrow xox
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