Sometimes it's not about what we DON'T do, but rather what we DO do. When you are going through a tough time, we seem to make it even harder on ourselves by trying to do more, then feeling worse about ourselves by not being able to accomplish it.
I was talking with my psychologist the other day, who informed me despite the feeling that I 'should' be back to normal - I am still healing on many different levels and need to be careful of the expectations that I put on myself. For all those reading that are go-getters you understand how hard this is! So she told me to write down everything I expect myself to do in a day - right down to the little things like getting out of bed, making the bed etc. Then look at it objectively…is anyone capable of completely all of that in a day?
Especially at this time of the year we get so caught up in all of the things that we NEED to do, that we forget that there is still the same amount of hours in the day and we can only fit in so much. Something will always give…and as I've mentioned before this generally is self care or actually doing the things you want to - because they feel self-indulgent…they 'should' come last after all of the practical to do's. Rubbish. If we don't look after ourselves, we aren't much good to anyone!
So what DO you accomplish in a day? Rather than feel guilty about what you didn't do, look at what you did. Feel proud of yourself for the little things - playing with the dog, sitting still long enough to have a cuppa, calling your family or even just getting out of bed if it's a bad day. And remind yourself regularly that you are only one person.
Ensure self-care and family time is number one all the time - particularly when things get frantic.