Sunday, November 30, 2014

Day 150

It is so important to spend time with the people you love. Yesterday I had a whirlwind trip to Melbourne I was able to spend time with 2 close friends. A bit of retail therapy (a huge pair of heels!) and a cuddle with one of my close friends new baby girl. Then I got to spend the evening with my boyfriend and met his friends and had a lovely night. 

This morning I travelled all the way back to the country for a day of work on both my businesses. A well rounded weekend I think! What I realised today with all my travel was that there was one thing that was missing! My own self-care! I realised the writing of my blog, meditation and just general well being. 

Sometimes a conscious decision needs to be made in order to do the things that are good for you. It's not always easy, but you definitely feel better for doing them. So a conscious decision was made for me today, to go back to doing the things that made my initial recovery so much easier…where my mental clarity and ability to make decisions for me were coming from a much better place. It's not quite a 'new years' resolution, but more of a reminder to look after yourself. 

Because at the end of the day if you don't look after yourself, you cannot look after and help anyone else. 

…Until Tomorrow xox

Wednesday, November 26, 2014

Day 149

Tomorrow marks the start of the '10 days in another world' - something I have volunteered on for many years. Due to my accident I am not able attend this year. Everytime I think about it my heart breaks a little more. It's difficult because most people have the response of 'let it go' or 'there's always next year''. 

What it is to me however is another example of what I have had to give up as a result of my accident. The difficulty of this, is that the "choice" was based on my physical wellness, not as a tangible choice. So yes I chose not to attend technically, but it was due to my accident and my injuries as a result of it. 

When I am faced with another thing (like the 10days) that I cannot do as a direct result of the accident, I am reminded again at the severity of my accident. And start to process and relive it all over again. It's funny how when you start to immerse yourself back into society and where things like "It could of been worse" or "at least you can walk" or "You'll be right" are said so frequently…You begin to believe them yourself. 

I give myself a reality check often and whilst I agree that I could be "worse off", I remind myself that each person experiences things differently and it is ok to feel however you are feeling. And the most important thing to remember about these comments is most people feel awkward or scared and are not sure what to say, so they say something they think is appropriate. THEY ARE JUST WORDS. 

The big thing about this, is sometimes no matter how many times you try to let go or move forward and are reminded about everything yet again, we have the right (for ourselves) to feel however we need to. Be careful not to let other people's behaviour or passive aggressive comments affect the way you think, feel or act. Keep ahold of your power. 

…Until Tomorrow xoxox

Monday, November 24, 2014

Day 148

I was driving today and decided to go a different route to the way that I normally go. I was stuck in roadworks for over 20 minutes!! I initially got a bit grumpy, but then I stopped and realised the similarities with any decision you make in life. 

Sometimes when we choose a road to travel, or a decision in life, it doesn't work. It does not mean it's the wrong road / decision or that you were wrong to try it - but may mean that it's not the right one for you. It's interesting when you make a decision in life - whether it's a 'minor' one like travelling a different way to work - or a 'major' one like moving interstate - you think that the decision is in concrete. It's not. Most decisions you make in life have the capacity to be altered. Most things are not set in concrete. And you can change your path whenever you choose to. (I could of made a U-turn and travelled back to go my 'normal way..or you can move back to where you originally were). 

Today I realised that sometimes the 'routine' or path that you most travel is perhaps the best one for you AT THAT TIME. And there is probably a reason that it works so well for you. You need to trust in your own judgement and feelings, for most decisions made from your own 'gut' feeling tend to be the best ones for you. The decisions you make for other people, or because other people are doing certain things, are not necessarily going to work for you. 

Be different. Be brave. Trust yourself. Don't be a sheep and follow.

…Until Tomorrow xox

Friday, November 21, 2014

Day 147

Mind over Matter. How often is this the case? A few posts ago I wrote about how little we transfer the skills of one area over to another. Yesterday I did my first 'cleanse' day, in an attempt to see if having a 'rest' day would help my tummy problems. At times throughout the day I was thinking I was 'hungry' and went to eat OUT OF HABIT, when I wasn't really hungry at all. 

I can be naturally stubborn - both a good and a bad thing depending on the situation - and I refused to 'give in' to these thoughts. A few times throughout the day I thought to myself how like running it was. If you have ran long distances before you would know that at times you feel like giving up, but your determination and inner strength make you keep going. The same applied yesterday with a cleanse. 

How often do we do things out of habit and not push ourselves to make the changes we want in our lives? I was talking to a friend the other day about giving up smoking. Same thing really, if you are focussed and determined enough it won't matter what your mind tells you what you 'should' do i.e. eat, have a cigarette, give up, because no matter what it tells you, you will choose not to listen and continue to work on your goal. 

This is such a positive thing that came out of yesterday, for it solidified that no matter what life (or your mind) throws at you, if you are determined enough you will get there. It really helped, as this week I have been struggling with not being able to exercise at the moment

, as my hours at work increase. But I am so determined to run my marathon (all being well early next year) that I know I will get there - regardless of all of the hurdles I have had, and those that are yet to come. 

It pertains to all life in general though - any dream or goal that you have. Remain focussed and determined and you will succeed. 

…Until Tomorrow xox

Tuesday, November 18, 2014

Day 146

There is nothing like getting into a good book - not wanting to put it down. It's so amazing to get lost in a different world - even if for five minutes! I am reading a book now that I can't put down…that is where my attention lies right now..with my book! 

It's great to allow yourself to be absorbed in something totally so it makes you forget about the other meaningless stuff in your world.  A good de-stressor. I use to be a bookworm. I loved reading. I use to challenge myself in the MS read-a-thon and read every night before I went to sleep! But somewhere along the line I got 'busy' or too tired to read and immerse myself in a book. Which really means I put other things first before the things I absolutely love. 

It's a wonderful way to relax and de-stress. Sometimes the simplest things - the ones that we put to the 'back burner' for when we have more time - are the most effective way to wind down. So dust off your bookshelf, turn off the computer and snuggle down with a good book! 

…Until Tomorrow xox

Sunday, November 16, 2014

Day 145

I have loved my day today! Initially I was meant to work, but my client called and said her puppy was very unsettled (due to the weather). So I stayed in bed and read a book and had cuddles with Buddy. I dragged myself out of bed and then did some jigsaws, visited my family and practiced my ukulele and now I get to end the day speaking to my beautiful boyfriend! I can't think of a better way to spend a Sunday. Yet normally I feel guilty for doing this! Instead I feel calm, refreshed and ready to go for a week of work tomorrow! 

Something my mum always says to me is that "Life's not meant to be this hard". It's true. When you find yourself battling up hill with something, sometimes you need to stop and take a step back to be able to continue to move forward. 

I just found the above quote when I was looking for quotes to add tonight. Then upon reflection I thought, that is exactly what I do! And when I'm most happiest is when I let go and just enjoy the 'moment'. I know that 'control' is often where anxiety is stemmed from. For if you want control so badly ALL of the time, when you loose it and feel 'out-of-control' and anxiety and fear begin to increase. But when you actively CHOOSE to be in the moment, the fear naturally decreases.

If I had put the pressure on myself to work today and instead I spent the day relaxing I would feel terrible and anxious that I didn't do what I wanted (or thought I needed) to. But because I chose to, I am actually a bit excited because I have listened to myself and actively did it! I talk a lot about listening to yourself and making decisions for yourself and being ok with it. But it can be so hard to do this sometimes, but when you get it right - it's an AMAZING feeling.

We can only work toward a happy and fulfilling life after we make the conscious decision to listen to ourselves.

…Until Tomorrow xox

Saturday, November 15, 2014

Day 144

If you lead a fulfilling and well rounded life, you will be happy each day. 

I was talking with my sister and one of her friends this afternoon, about whether 'life is a journey'. I have a slight issue with this saying, as it implies that there is a destination. To which my sister replied "death"! But is there a destination? Or many destinations? What I believe is that life is a series of goals, and as you achieve one, you will work toward another. 

Although we all need to be happy with where we are at any given point, the drive to achieve a goal gives us the motivation to get out of bed and to move forward. The goal may change - buying a house, getting a promotion, having children, running a marathon, etc. I think what you are currently working toward is irrespective as long as there is some movement forward. I like what Albert Einstein once wrote "In order to be happy you need to tie yourself to a goal…" For the most part I agree! 

You also need to be happy with who you are at this precise moment - not with who you are going to be in a few months, or who you were a few months ago. Because like our goals, we change as we grow and we need to respect and love ourselves. 

Look in the mirror tonight - look past what the little negative self is saying, look at yourself as though you are looking at yourself through someone else's eyes. You are the whole sum of yourself. Sometimes we focus WAY too much on the negative and forget that it is a minute part of ourselves. Accept that we all have parts of ourselves that are not perfect, but that is what makes us unique! Embrace it! :) 

…Until Tomorrow xox

Thursday, November 13, 2014

Day 143

It's so important to find what works for you. What works as a motivation to get things done. What works to promote yourself. What works to keep your balance. Everything that you will do, will be different to the person next to you. It's so crucial to work it all out, so you can be the best version of yourself. 

I realised this week that I have fallen back into old habits - in regards to work. I was working hard, chasing my tail and not getting anywhere. What I wasn't doing was working smarter. I wrote about this earlier in the week. But for me, I really need to have some 'downtime' doing absolutely nothing, in order to be effective in work, relationships, family, friends, play etc. Or else I loose my passion and excitement and just 'go through the motions'. That is terrible for business (and relationships) - who wants to be around someone that just goes through the motions?!

You want to be around people that are positive, pick you up and are excited and passionate!!  So in order to continue to be excited, I have to do the things that I don't like to do as soon as they hit my to-do list (then they are done, I feel happy and relieved and I'm ready to focus on the things that I LOVE!) And also they don't then hang over your head and drag you down. Paperwork for me! I dislike it, so I have to do it as soon as I get it, or it sits there and continues to get shuffled onto the next days to-do list, and never gets done!!

How do you refill your cup? We need to do this daily to be able to maintain the lives we lead now - with all the stress, extra work, bills etc that are constantly growing. I know I love to do jigsaw puzzles, read my book, play with my dog and meditate. These are the things that get done after paperwork (so not often!!) but not after this week. Now my self-care and doing the things that recharge me get done first, so I am better equipped to work through the other stuff! 

Don't let others disappoint you - be your own reason to be happy. 

...Until Tomorrow xox

Tuesday, November 11, 2014

Day 142

What are you waiting for? The time will never be "right". You will always be "busy". You need to take a step out of your comfort zone for things to really start happening for you! How often do we hear things like that? But what does it really mean for you? 

Most of us get use to leading the same life…and get caught up in the day-to-day humdrum of life, worried by the little things. We forget to live sometimes. I was reminded of 'living' (not just walking around breathing) but getting that excitement from little things again today. I had an appointment with the specialist and was given better idea of my progress and the ability to move forward from here. 

So I came home and decided to make a few life changes in order to appreciate my life more…
1. No technology in bed (no laptop, iPhone etc)
2. Write my to-do list for tomorrow the night before and HIGHLIGHT the HAVE TO DO. 
3. Allow myself to 'be' and just spend time to not do!
4. Spend quality time with the ones I love
5. Have an hour a day of no PHONE!!
6. Share any knowledge that I know with anyone that needs it
7. Write regularly
8. Exercise, build strength and Stretch!!
9. Do "WORK" in my office - leave the rest of the house for living
10. Have at least one NO WORK day!! 

Of course nothing I have listed is rocket science, but it's the living and abiding it is the important and challenging thing. I have done all of this this afternoon and feel amazing now! :) Another few things is to eliminate some words from my vocabulary - "should" and "busy" being the main ones at the moment. 

What changes can you do to help you appreciate life more? Or for you to have more 'time' or 'strength' to step outside of your comfort zone to achieve what you always have wanted? 

…Until Tomorrow xox

Sunday, November 9, 2014

Day 141

Distance. Space between you and someone you care about. Being apart. It's challenging. One of the reasons I moved back to the country 2 years ago was to be closer to my family, closer to the ones I love. Today I spent the day catching up. It feels like since I've started my return to work program after my accident everything 'normal' (like the housework, washing, Buddy, cleaning my car etc) has fallen by the wayside. Including seeing my family and friends. 

This afternoon I spent time with mum and dad. No 'restrictions' with my time. We had a cup of tea, played cards and nattered. THAT is what I moved here for. I realised tonight that I have fallen back into old habits of being 'busy' but not with the things that are most important to me. Like seeing mum and dad, last night I spent time with my sister. I feel so calm tonight - even though I still have a 'to-do' list for my businesses - I specifically CHOSE not to do anything on them today. 

That was a ginormous challenge. When you actively CHOOSE not to do something that comes naturally to you and you are a hard worker - NOT doing it is very conscious. And takes practice and disciplan. But more importantly is the time I got to spend with my family. My boyfriend lives 3 hours away. This is yet another huge challenge about distance from the ones you love. Tonight made me realise how hard this can be as he is unwell.

This made me reflect on the importance of seeing the ones you love when you can. Not leaving it for 'another day' or 'a day that's less busy'. What was interesting in my reflection was that when you live closer to someone, you seem to see them or spend quality time with them less than when you only see them for short periods. This is something I am to change in myself. I want to spend REGULAR quality time with the ones I love - no matter what the distance…

Do you spend quality time with your friends, family and loved ones? Or is your mind always on what you need to do next? 

…Until Tomorrow xox 

Friday, November 7, 2014

Day 140

Taking actual time out for yourself. We always say that 'I need a pyjama day' or 'I'm just going to relax and have an early night'. But is that truly what you need? I figured out today that I need to meditate, I got a healing massage (which hurt like anything) and reiki done. After it I felt like the whole week (which has been challenging) was bare able. I became more optimistic and strong about persevering and working toward my dream. 

We all know how important it is to 'look after yourself' - but do we really do it on a daily basis? It should be done as regularly as possible. We often have a facial regime, a body regime and for some a foot or hair treatment. What is just as important - if not more so, is the mental regime. Mental care. For if you aren't coping properly mentally then everything else will suffer also. Stress is a HUGE cause of premature ageing and ongoing health problems. 

One thing that will help you with this is "not to compare somebody's outside with your inside". Meaning someone may make something look  effortless, look done up and beautiful all the time or have "everything". But you will never know what is going on internally with someone - it may not be as 'effortless' as you think. Before you judge yourself against someone else, make sure they are on the exact same path as you - or better yet - don't judge or compare. You will feel better for it. 

So take some time out this weekend and really pamper yourself. Do something that makes you feel calm and happy to be you. Remember to always ask yourself, are you a good person to live with? If the answer is no, then you need to reengage yourself with what you want to be like to live with by taking proper time out for yourself!

…Until Tomorrow xox

Wednesday, November 5, 2014

Day 139

There are so many parallels between training dogs and training yourself. Dog psychology is not too far different from our own. I went to my psychologist today to have a chat about the last few weeks, and what she did was to help me identify the 'underlying' causes. It's no different when you look at a behaviour in a dog - you need to figure out what is causing them to behave that way, instead of training the behaviour. 

We, in humanity, will look at our 'feelings' or our 'behaviour' and try to stop or change them, rather than looking at what is going on underneath..what is causing us to feel or act that way. Sometimes you need an outsider to peek in and tell you what is happening underneath. We can get so clouded in what we are doing, that we are unable to see the underlying cause. 

So many of the skills I teach people to train their own dogs, could easily be transferred to us - without much adjustment. I was in a Nutrimetics leadership meeting the other day and I realised that my motto for dog training which is "Consistency, Clarity, Calmness and Confidence" could easily pertain to business..or life in general. 

What I found so interesting was that we compartmentalise so much, that I'd never really thought of the skills I have as a dog trainer being able to be transferred to other areas of my life. But that is what happens isn't it. You are a combination of all of your experiences, all of your jobs, all of your skills - even if you don't think they pertain to the current job. You can transfer ALL of your experience to any part of your life. Especially when you are dealing with people! 

I think a good exercise to do here, would be to write down all of the skills you have learnt across your different areas and see how they interlink. I just did it then - very interesting. I have worked with people with a disability for over 10years - the skills I have learnt in this area have enabled me to assist with potentially volatile people in the public, change the way I say things to different people depending on how they understand things, has made me a patient listener and enables me to understand some of the complexity of human behaviour. Amongst other things of course!! 

What skills do you have that are used frequently?

…Until Tomorrow xox

Tuesday, November 4, 2014

Day 138

Strength. Determination. Persistence. Hard work. Never loosing sight of the bigger picture. Every success comes with many 'failures' (I prefer hurdles). All good comes to those that work hard. Excetera Excetera. All of this is amazingly true. And I believe that majority of the time those that put in the extra work will see the benefits. 

I think what is difficult for the people who are the hard workers to see is that the hard work you put in now, may not be seen immediately, but in 3, 6 or 12months time. It's not an easy place to be in when you are working so hard and feel like you are treading water. And it's OK to have those days where you vent, or stop and take a deep breath. It is these days where I use to go for a 2-3hour the end of the run I would be recharged and have my next steps all sorted. But for now, I am left more with my own thoughts, practicing different methods to clear the head and regain focus. 

How do you regain focus when the hard work you are putting in is not paying off yet? I have figured out what works for me. I have a day where I do many little things that do pay off personally - I have a 'pyjama' day. A day where I can tick off many 'to do's' and feel amazing for doing so. Today I accomplished many little things. I have transferred what I haven't done onto a new list for tomorrow. And I allow myself to just be. 

Things or goals don't just happen. You do need hard work to achieve them. But what you also need is some down time. Certainly use some to reflect, etc. But really take some time to loose yourself in something - anything that is not "DOING", but "BEING". Allow yourself to feel achievement for being. How?? Sit in the sun. Feel the grass under your feet. Put a movie on. Go for a walk. Do something simply because you can. Not because you HAVE to. 

I think most people - especially the 'Do-ers' and the strongly motivated people in the world, forget that all things do take time. No person had success overnight. Most did in fact have more failures than successes. It is what you do with those 'failures' that determine your future. 
My boyfriend told me a story today, about a man who searched for gold for many months, then sold his equipment for a 10th of the price and gave up. The man that bought his equipment continued searching in the same area, and struck gold a mere 10m from where the first man quit. You never know when you are going to stuck gold - it could be just around the corner. 

What would you do? Sell your equipment and give up? Or persevere and find success a short time later? 

…Until Tomorrow xox